The Mama Perspective | Motherhood and Maternal Wellbeing

A space for real stories, shared experiences and modern motherhood

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Natasha is a mum of two little boys and the voice behind The Mama Perspective. Passionate about maternal mental health and self-care, she writes honestly about the highs, lows, and healing moments of motherhood.
  • How Me and My Son Grow Together

    How Me and My Son Grow Together

    Being a mum is everything to me. Ever since I saw the two pink lines on the first pregnancy test I took, I had to take two to three more, to really believe it. Every single step of the way from the morning (any time of the day) sickness, to gaining a baby bump, first kicks, and finding out if our baby was going to be a boy or girl, I found a new love.

    Being a mum is my priority. I will do everything in my power to make sure my son (Freddy) is happy. Sometimes, that’s a little stroke on his head and a kiss on his forehead, or a cuddle and sitting still for a while in the moment. It also means being the mum who understands what Freddy enjoys. Every child likes to learn in their own way. So, when Freddy gets happy about counting numbers, or singing the alphabet, I’m here to say well done. When he meets new friends, welcomes them and shares his toys, I’m here to say “Good boy.”

    The thing is, as a mum, I’ve noticed more and more that people can be so quick to judge from the outside. And sadly at times, those people include women who are mums themselves.

    I’d be lying if I told you I haven’t worried about the little details, mostly stemming from being out in public since Freddy was born and then onto starting new chapters of Freddy’s life like primary school. After a while though, I take a step back and realise he is still and will always be learning. Small milestones are worth celebrating.

    For example, during his first week of school, Freddy was mostly carried there each morning whilst crying. Week two was up and down. Then by the time week three arrived – he was walking to school happily, holding his lunch bag and reading bag. He always makes me feel so proud.

    Being a mum always reminds me what’s important. And I do tend to feel guilty for worrying so much because in a way, it can come across like I’m pressuring Freddy. But I’m not, it’s more people’s judgements that I struggle with. I’m starting to see that’s not always the case and there are struggles that other parents are bound to be facing.

    Freddy is his own little person and his personality is shining every day. Together, me and him will learn to grow, through the dancing and the sadness. I want him to be able to express how he feels and teach him that it’s okay. He is human just like me.

  • My Son’s First Two Weeks of School

    My Son’s First Two Weeks of School

    A couple of weeks ago, I shared a post on how I was feeling about my son starting school for the first time. It’s been a little up and down with getting him dressed in the morning. We’re getting there though. He’s not crying as much going to school. But that’s typical Freddy – he has the time of his life once he’s there. When I seen photos of him playing via one of the school’s social pages, I immediately smiled.

    When we pick him up, he walks out looking so happy with a big smile on his face as he runs to us. Seeing him wearing his little backpack that’s actually more than half the size of him and carrying his reading bag, melts my heart. Little Mr Independent.

    So, I think at first, it’s the change from private nursery to primary school. Freddy is all about routine – days of the work associated with certain environments and directions on where those places are. But two weeks in, and full time from now on (woooo), we’re starting to notice a difference.

    Just yesterday, when we arrived at the playground outside school, Freddy said, “Yay!” and was happy to see the teachers open the doors. He’s took a liking to a certain one of course, and goes in for her to hold his hand or have a cuddle first. Freddy has been this way ever since starting private nursery at 9 months old. It’s always really nice to see. He likes to root for his safe person in the room so I’m happy he has her.

    Remember I said I might even meet a mum friend too? Well, there’s one who has said hi and chatted to me and Danny right from Freddy’s first day and her daughter is so friendly to all the kids. I hope there are more parents and children that can be as kind. And there’s something special when seeing her and Freddy walking back from school some days and going to the shop. You wouldn’t guess it, but Freddy goes for ice pops, no matter the weather! Oh, and one of each colour that’s in the freezer. I do love him and his cheekiness. Every time I hear him say, “Shop now” it’s either going to be to stock up on ice pops, fruit, or cucumbers! Random choices I know, but they are his go-to items.

    I happen to be writing this part last but it’s the one thing that I still stare at and makes me realise just how much Freddy is growing. The uniform. Seeing him wearing it, especially through struggled of getting him dressed most days so far, he’s always happy once it’s done and looks extra cute each day. He’s obsessed with his dinosaur wellies and I love it.

    No matter if Freddy finds something challenging, even if other kids don’t, or what comes to easy to him, but not for other children, it’s okay. He’s his own little person and I couldn’t be prouder of him. I say that and he’ll probably do something new and I’m amazed again.

    Here’s to Freddy on his new adventure. Go and have the best time!

  • Nothing Needs to Be Picture Perfect

    Nothing Needs to Be Picture Perfect

    There’s more to life than being ‘picture perfect’. Behind the cracks, nothing is ever perfect. One day, probably not so often, you might see a photo where I was looking nice for a few hours but then the next, I’m in my comfy clothes walking back from Gregg’s eating a sausage roll without a care in the world. If you’re new to my blog, something about me you can find out now is that food makes me happy and I always bring it up in conversation.

    It’s good to have days where you feel more confident about yourself but we shouldn’t lose too much authenticity to how we look and feel naturally. Smile because you deserve to be happy. Wear the outfit because you feel comfortable in it not because you constantly feel like you have to look your best or make an impression.

    The power of social media has always puzzled me. It’s easy to get hooked, on the not so good habits, like comparing your life to someone else’s. I’m guilty. I’ve done it and still do to be honest. But it’s also a happy place to share things that are important to you or like a digital memory box.

    It’s easy to feel like everything in life needs to be picture perfect. I see flawlessly curated feeds showcasing the same perfect appearances, perfect homes, and perfect families. But behind every post, there’s a reality that’s often messy, imperfect, and chaotic. Why don’t we share more honesty? I don’t mean we have to go full on negative but you know, something a bit closer to reality.

    Live in the moment. There’s always something worth smiling for right now in the present. This is coming from a woman who worries left right and centre. It’s like it’s embedded in my brain to but I’m trying to not let it overpower me. Just the other day, I asked Danny, “where do you store all the worrysome stuff?” and he told me something along the lines of “Channel your energy into something. Write, go to the gym, go for a walk, do whatever makes you happy.”

    Life doesn’t need to be perfect to be meaningful. Your appearance doesn’t have to meet every societal standard to be accepted for who you are. A photograph doesn’t need to be flawless to capture a special moment. Family life isn’t about having everything in order but about sharing love, even in all the chaos. A fun social life isn’t about constant plans but about real friendships even in quieter moments.

    Life isn’t real without imperfections. Guess what? Going to the gym and ending up with a red sweaty face after a workout is normal. Bumping into someone in the middle of your food shop isn’t your best look but it’s fine. My whispy hair is in full force today and that’s okay too.

    Being perfect is over rated anyway. I’m going to take a leaf out of my son’s book and be happy over the little things. The way his face lights up, makes everything else slow down.

  • How do I feel about my son starting primary school?

    How do I feel about my son starting primary school?

    On the first week of September my son will start a new chapter of his life – primary school. Me and Danny have been talking about it coming up in the future but now it’s so close we’re a mixture of emotions. Excited, proud, bittersweet, you know? He will leaving a lot of his close friends behind at nursery as he steps into a new nursery life at primary school.

    We’ve bought the uniform. And I already know I’m going to cry once he is wearing it on his first day of primary school. The little polo with the school jumper on top, and the grey trousers, with his new shoes, oh he will look the absolute cutest.

    Freddy has been in private nursery since he was 9 months old and will end his time there at the end of August. He turned 3 years old earlier this month. A couple of people have asked me why we’re sending him to school at 3 years old and not waiting until 4 years old. And me being me, I actually started to panic, wondering if he is going to be okay. But as I do, especially as mum, I got inside my own head. As his parents, me and Danny know that Freddy will start primary school and he will love it. He is going to thrive, continuing to learn new things and make new friends. He might not fully understand that he’s moving into somewhere new just yet but we are here by his side each step of the way, just as his teacher will be. Plus, there we will 20+ other children in the same boat.

    Me and Danny sat down and went through his memory books together the other night looking at how much his learning, social, and development has progressed. It wouldn’t be right if I didn’t cry as I went through the pages. Happy tears though.

    Freddy’s school teacher came to visit him at nursery and we were told that he loves her. Of course, he wanted cuddles and to show her all of his books he was enjoying at the time.

    I couldn’t be prouder of the young, happy little soul he’s grown into. It feels like I gave birth one minute, spent a while trying to find myself again, and suddenly my baby will soon be starting his new adventure. A whole new chapter – you keep being your amazing self, Freddy.

    And who knows, maybe I’ll meet some more mum friends too!

  • 3 Years of Motherhood

    3 Years of Motherhood

    My little boy has turned 3 which means he’s now officially one tenth of my age. So, I’ve been someone’s mum for a whole three years. A little person’s MUM – that’s something to celebrate, isn’t it?

    From seeing two positive lines on a pregnancy test, to morning (all day) sickness. From the first scan to the first kick. From finding out if you’ll be a boy girl to watching you grow as ‘bump’. From nursery bedroom prep to a few hospital visits to monitor my blood pressure. From sitting in the bath on a Monday morning to planning to meet you within the next two to three days. From going to the park with your daddy for a walk to labour starting to kick in. From my waters breaking and intense contractions to being rushed to the delivery suite. From being moved onto the bed with staff around me to pushing three times. From looking up to see your beautiful face to holding you in my arms. From feeling you perfectly fit in my arms to handing you over to your daddy and midwife to dress you. Pregnancy was the beginning but giving birth to you was a whole new chapter. And here’s how you’ve always been the best person to call my son.

    You make me a stronger person

    Since becoming your mummy, I’ve felt no resilience like it. I’ve also started to speak up about things I’ve held back before. It wasn’t until bringing into the world that I realised the effects my mental health had on me and where a lot my thoughts and feelings stemmed from.

    You help me find a better perspective

    You have taught me what’s important. Without you, I wouldn’t be as happy as I am today. My smile is brighter because of you. When I think about each day ahead, I think of you first.

    You impact how much I grow mentally and emotionally

    It’s true. It’s no surprise that, especially as a toddler, you teach me resilience and patience! You have the determination like no one I’ve ever known. When you want to explore something new, you’re set on a mission to complete it as independently as you can. Meanwhile, I’m here trying to stay calm, wondering if you’ll listen and sometimes knowing that I have to let you know experiment with new ways of learning and exploring. But I think the most important way you’ve helped me grow is remembering that you mirror how I think, speak, and feel. If I’m sad, you’re also sad and want to comfort me. I want to do everything I can to make sure I’m always my happiest self for me but more for you.

    You really have taught me what it means to love someone unconditionally and I’ll be forever grateful to have you in my life and to call you my son.